Cathy in the Wright

He Goes To Eleven

The Governor and I spent the day running tedious errands. As a perk for behaving so well the entire time, I took him to the McDonalds with the Playland for lunch.

It was late in the afternoon, so the place wasn't too crowded. We headed for the bathrooms first, but we held at bay by the official McDonald's Centurion - an employee on her lunch break. She had her mouth full of salad, but she made the most of her plastic fork - slashing it wildly in the air. We stopped. She started talking through the croutons but I couldn't understand her. Another employee came up from behind us and declared, "Those bathrooms are closed! You'll have to use the one in the Playland area!"

I thanked them both. After the initial fork thrust, I did notice a mass of yellow caution tape and printed signs warning me away, but that's the kind of thing a person is liable to overlook. Good thing they had a back-up system in place.

The Playland had a single, uni-sex bathroom. It wasn't occupied, so in we went. Now I hate using the bathroom with my 3-year old. The Governor is too observant, too curious, and too loud. The minute the door locked, he went into full declarative mode...at top volume:

Mom! I want to do the flushing!

Mom! Do you think someone pooped in here?

Mom! Don't forget to wash your hands!

Mom! I wish I was a chicken nugget!

Mom! You rock! Way to wash your hands!

Hey! I RULE the world!

He thoroughly enjoyed himself. The only thing that dampened his spirits was finding out that once you push the button on the hand dryer, you can't turn it off by pushing it again.

Mom! This thing is SOOOO busted!

We unlocked the door and walked out into a small group of patrons who had formed a queue for the rest room.

Judging from the smirks, I don't think they missed anything.

Next time I think we'll go for the less attention-drawing method of relieving ourselves by just going out behind the restaurant dumpster.

Posted by Cathy at September 15, 2005 08:14 PM