In 1956, I went duck hunting with buddies from the University of North Dakota at Grand Forks, who assigned me an ancient, single-shot .410-gauge shotgun—a pea-shooter clue to our party’s low expectations for me. Hah! I made the long shot of the day, dropping a Mallard so far into the slough the retriever had to rest halfway to the bird. (Well, that’s the way I recall it, anyway.) Since my first hunt was a top-gun performance, it also was my last. That’s because, as I’ve been known humbly to explain, there was no room for improvement.
So, while I’m not an acolyte of Nimrod, god of the hunt, I feel comfortable offering Sen. Kerry advice about hunting.
Firstly, if you really killed that goose, why didn’t you carry it? I was so proud of my trophy Mallard, I would have wrestled the retriever for possession. Confess! Didn’t you really bag one of those French honkers that has its feet nailed to a board and is force fed grain to give the culinary world Paté de fois gras?
Secondly, you missed a photo op by not gutting and plucking the goose. Entirely inexperienced, I nevertheless was able to dress out my trophy duck, along with several others, awarded in recognition of my Sgt. York marksmanship.
Finally, my duck was cooked, but how ‘bout your goose? It must be difficult to choose between a delicately sauced presentation dish and copious application of your wife’s branded ketchup? The suspense is killing, but at least we’ll know, Nov. 3, whether your goose is cooked?
We can only hope that Mr. Kerry's goose is cooked. In previous photo ops of Mr. Kerry handling a firearm he showed a total lack of gun basic gun safety skills. If he would have pulled this around me or little furry obnoxious hunting companions he would have been asked to leave. That assumes that I could be trusted with a firearm around him.
Posted by: DaveP at October 22, 2004 11:49 AMDaveP,
You couldn't be trusted around Mr. Kerry with a firearm. I wouldn't let him around my furry companions in the field or otherwise, you never know.
Posted by: DeannP at October 22, 2004 02:48 PMDaveP,
You couldn't be trusted around Mr. Kerry with a firearm. I wouldn't let him around my furry companions in the field or otherwise, you never know.
Posted by: Lil Plum at October 22, 2004 02:48 PMPhoto op? But Kerry is an experienced hunter, he told us so. Just like he told us "he voted for it ... before he voted aginst it". Because everyone just stops campaigning with 2 weeks to go before a Presidential Election and decides to go goose hunting. Or was it a wild goose chase for votes in Ohio? Next thing you know he's going to tell us "He has a plan ..."
Posted by: bill at October 27, 2004 03:46 PM