February 09, 2004

G.L.O.W. Calling...We Heard About Your Game Last Night

For those of you who are not wrestling fans, GLOW stands for Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling. I think. I don't know if it's still on tv or not. Anyone who's still curious, I invite you to my next Freak League soccer game. (Although Gorgeous Ladies of Boxing - GLOB - might be more representative of last evening's match.)

We played Balkans United. Their entire team is comprised of Eastern Europeans and South Americans. Any time a bunch of pasty Minnesotans is going to play a team like this, we expect to have our rears handed to us. Even in a recreational league. Count on it. The only advantage we ever muster is that their women have no talent, so it's like playing a man short for them. The men have no use for their women on the field. They never pass to them. The only reason the women show up is so the men can qualify to play in a co-rec league.

So, we're ahead 1-0 which is amazing. The other team is starting to get angry. Their normal level of play is rough; when they get hot it turns to brutal. Tempers were flaring. Now I was pretty much exempt from all this as they put their one woman near me and left us to fend for ourselves. As expected, their woman had no talent. The only thing she could do was to try and obstruct me every chance she got. I got fed up with her backing into me as I was trying to move around her, so I gave her a well-placed elbow in the ribs.

She whirled around and got right in my face. Well, right in my chin, actually. She was rather short.

"Yoooooooo doe-int touch me!"
Well then get out of my way.
"Yoooooo doe-int have to touch!"
She drew her hand back to hit slap me and the ref decided it was time to break it up. Pity. While I would never have struck her first, I have no problem with retaliation.

While the fans were robbed of a good cat-fight, they weren't completely disappointed. Right before the end of the game there was an actual fist fight between a couple of guys. Red cards were flying. The game ended early.

Replacing torn jersey: $28
Ice pack used to reduce swelling under the eye: $4
Beating a bunch of arrogant pricks who should have won by a dozen goals: priceless

Posted by Cathy at February 9, 2004 02:04 PM
Comments

Is it possible to talk down to a midget? ;-)

Posted by: aelfheld at February 9, 2004 04:04 PM

One of us getting into fights at soccer games is enough. I don't recommend it!

Posted by: Sis at February 10, 2004 11:29 AM

Aelfheld...'Is it possible to talk down to a midget?'

Only if you're making small talk.

And not trying to belittle them.

Sis...just trying to keep the family reputation in tact! :)

Posted by: Cathy at February 10, 2004 10:33 PM

Cathy, you are so hot right now...I'd do ya. Seriously, I'd totally do ya.

Posted by: picklejuice at February 11, 2004 10:16 PM

Natalie...Right back at ya, Baby!

Posted by: Cathy at February 12, 2004 10:35 AM